Do not be bitter or angry or mad. Never shout angrily or say things to hurt others. Never do anything evil. Ephesians 4:31
Lucy walked into the house, her hand clenching her third grade report card.
As always, her dad was lying on the couch, and she approached him nervously, stopping at a safe distance. Young as she was, experience had taught her what to expect.
“Dad,” her voice trembled. “Teacher said you had to sign this It’s my report…”
Her father hefted himself to his feet, stumbling on a wine bottle as he walked towards her. “Well, let’s see how you did.”
Lucy’s hand shook as she gave him the card.
“You got two D-s… one for math and the other for reading! WHY?”
She started to cry. “I don’t know, Dad. I tried really hard.”
Her father undid his belt and pulling it free, grabbed his eight– year– old daughter. “If your mom was still alive she would be ashamed of you too.”
Lucy started to cry, and as he started hitting her with the leather strap. Lucy cried even louder.
************
It would be one beating after another over the years that followed. Lucy’s life divided between the misery at home and her friend Amy.
As a twelve year old standing at the front of church with Amy beside her, Lucy was grateful her friend had invited her to church three years earlier. She had been surprised her dad let her go, and keep going.
Now, in front of all the people in the church, Lucy had gone forward to accept Jesus as her Lord and Savior. She did not understand this heavenly Father, but she knew that He loved her. Holding Amy’s hand, she prayed to receive Jesus.
For the first time in her life, Lucy was at peace.
*************
After graduating from high school, Lucy and Amy left for college, moving into the same dorm.
Months later, while watching the news, a story caught the girls’ attention.
“There has been a major accident on Interstate 35 tonight. A man in a Ford Focus allegedly drove his vehicle on the wrong side of the road, where it collided head on with a pickup truck. Police have reported that the driver of the Focus had a two point eight blood alcohol level. Both drivers were taken to the hospital, where they are reported to be in critical condition.”
As video of the drunk driver flashed across the screen, Amy turned shocked eyes toward her friend. “Lucy, that looks like your dad.”
Lucy shook her head. “I’m sure it’s not.”
Amy leaned a little closer to the television and squinted her eyes to try and get a clearer view. “I think it is your dad.”
Before Lucy could reply, the phone rang and she answered it.
“Hello.”
“Is this Lucy Littlefield?”
“This is Lucy.”
“I’m Officer Moore from the Minnesota State Patrol.”
“Okay,” Lucy said, her eye‘s rolling. Knowing this call was about her dad.
“Is your father Colin Littlefield?”
“Yeah.” She frowned.
“We want to make sure we have the right person. We found your number on a card in your dad’s wallet. Your father was in a major car accident this evening. He was under the influence–.”
Lucy cut in. “Thank you, Officer. I don’t need to hear anymore. I just heard about it on the news. Thanks for calling,”
Then she hung up.
“So, that was your dad that was on TV,” Amy said.
Lucy nodded angrily. “Yes, you were right. It was my stupid, drunk father.”
“Are you going to go and see him?” Concern showed on Amy’s face
“NO!” Lucy yelled
“But he’s your father.”
“I don‘t care I’m NOT going.”
*********
With college behind them, both girls found jobs and rented a house together.
Arriving home one evening, Lucy walked into the kitchen where Amy was cooking dinner in the microwave. Lucy picked up the mail on the kitchen table and asked, “Any calls for me?”
“Yeah, there was one call, — your dad. He wants to take you out for dinner.”
Lucy threw down the mail. “I don’t want to have anything to do with him.”
Amy looked into her friend’s eyes. “I know you’ve been through a lot, and I can understand why you would not want to see him. But he’s turned his life around. He’s become a Christian, and a different person. I talked to him for a half hour.”
“Amy, be real. He beat me, and he’s a drunk!”
“You need to forgive him. He’s not a drunk anymore, and he wants to apologize.”
“Never!”
Lucy walked out of the house, heading to her car. She had to get away.
Slamming the car door behind her, she rammed the key into the ignition. Shifted the car into what she thought was reverse, and hit the accelerator. Instead of going backwards, the car charged forward, smashing through the garage wall.
When she saw the damage to the house, and realized what she had done, Lucy started to cry.
Amy ran to the car.
“Ohhh myyyy gosh! Lucy, are you okay?”
“Look what I did to the garage” Lucy said through her sobs.
Amy opened the car door. “Come on, Lucy. Get out of the car and come inside.”
She helped her sobbing friend back into the house and sat beside her on the couch.
“Lucy, we’ve been friends for years, and I am very concerned about you. This accident happened because you won’t forgive your dad. Every time I mention him you blow up.”
Lucy continued to cry. “B-but h -he beat me.”
Amy handed Lucy a tissue. “I know, but you’ve got to forgive him. You’re both Christians now. Christ has changed your life, and he changed your father’s life too. He’s a different person.”
“I don’t think I can do it.”
“Lucy, do you know what Jesus said about forgiveness? He said we need to forgive others if we want our own sins forgiven.”
“It’s too hard.”
“Come on. Call him up and talk to him.”
Lucy cried for a few more minutes then stopped and sighed, “Okay.”
With a deep breath, she picked up the phone and made the call.
The phone rang a few times, and then a male voice answered. “This is Colin.”
“Dad, it’s Lucy.”
“LU…CY! How are you doing honey? It’s good to hear your voice. I’ve wanted to talk to you for ages, and I need to ask you to please forgive me for being a drunk father. I was hurting over your mom’s death, but I can’t blame you for not wanting to have a relationship with me. I was a bad father, but things have changed and I’m a different person now. I‘d like to take you out for dinner. ”
“It’s a hard thing for me to do. After all, you beat me for years.”
“Honey, I can’t tell you how sorry I am for that, but I want to start over. Please give me a chance. I do love you, and I’m very sorry for how I treated you.”
Lucy took a deep breath, “Okay. I’ll think about your dinner invitation.”
“Please do honey. I really want to start over, and I mean it.”
As Lucy hung up the phone, she could feel a piece of ice around her heart start to melt.
I know what it’s like to hurt. My mom committed suicide when I was 14. If you’ve had hurts or bitterness please share your story with me. Please click on email me. kenswalkthewalk@gmail..com